Everyone is always curious as to how I started writing music. I have to say, that I endulged in writing poetry and short stories first. Since I loved to read, I became moved by words and poetry was my first escape from reality. To fully express myself with no judgement and no remorse. To pour my heart and tears within pages of secrecy. I found privacy and created a world of my own. Many times I would sit in my room in silence and never speak about my feelings of being hurt, or angry, or sad. I kept it all within my journal. Growing up, I was extremely reflective for being so young and I felt misunderstood many times. Writing was an escape at first but now has flourished into full expression of my mind, heart and spirit. Below, I wanted to share some very personal poems of mine. To explore my heart, my mind and bond with my emotions.
I remember the night sky and the bright moon above us;
Our eyes connected as I surrendered to you;
I searched your soul and found beauty.
As you held me, I felt completion, I felt loved.
And that is what I've searched for, an embrace of no words;
We needed no words but only two hearts in need of eachother.
A moment in heaven is what you gave me.
I closed my eyes as a tear ran down my cheek;
As I felt your arms pull me closer to you;
As your chin rested on my head ever so lovingly;
My mind drifted as the silence surrounded our emotions;
I wished in my heart that we could be like this for eternity.
I felt your heartbeat with mine, almost in unison;
I felt your tender touches and my soul cried;
All of my secrets and desires were made up of you, only you;
Every second my of my heartbeat called your name;
But you did not hear, you did not respond.
I LET you consume me.
I LET you confuse me.
I LET you use me.
If an angel were to cry, please cry for me;
so I won't feel so alone.
In the darkness of misery, I wait for a beam of light to awaken my consciousness;
My soul succumbs to emptiness as I drown in tears of blood;
For I have lost this battle.
I try as best as I can to sustain;
Standing tall, as the last ounce of faith drains from my veins.
Your words pierced through the fragile tissue that encases my soul.
My heart is held in the palm of my hands as I extent it to you.
I feel that I can't remain forever giving;
And for you to remain forever taking.
I can give no more because there is nothing left of me to give;
But you still take.
A bottomless pit to feed your ego.
My love could never be enough.
My life as you know it is perfect, but perfection cannot be accomplished;
For who I am is what has made me, but you could never know the real me.
I will not explain my tribulations or obstacles to prove myself.
I will not rant and rave about how I will prove it to you.
I will show you that life is only what has made me grow.
I could never make you understand the pain within that I fight.
I could never make you hurt from the people that have crossed paths with me.
I will never make you see how much betrayal I have come to live with.
Yet I live my life for the better, only to justify what is rightfully mine;
Never will anyone take my soul from me.
Never will anyone prove to me what I can prove to myself.
I say this in spite of everyone who tried to prey on my pure spirit.
I say this to all those who have shunned me in the end trying to destroy the good heart I maintained.
All that I have is faith and hope to reward my soul with what really counts.
DO NOT JUDGE ME FOR WHAT YOU THINK I AM BECAUSE I ONLY EXIST AS WHO I AM.
A Messenger of Love; A Spiritual Being here to help Humanity raise their Vibrations. 13Love is the Movement.